Sinodun Hills

Walk 2012

In this sweet field high raised above the Thames
Beneath the trenched hill of Sinodun
Amidst sweet dreams of disembodied names
Abide the setting of the August sun,
Here where this long ridge tells of days now done;
This moveless wave wherewith the meadow heaves
Beneath its clover and its barley-sheaves.

Across the gap made by our English hinds
Amidst the Roman's handiwork, behold
Far off the long-roofed church the shepherd binds
The withy round the hurdles of his fold
Down the foss the riverbed of old,
That through the long lapse of time has grown to be
The little grassy valley that you see.

Rest here awhile, not yet the eve is still,
The bees are wandering yet, and you may hear,
The barley mowers on the trenched hill,
The sheep-bells, and restless changing weir
All little sounds made musical and clear
Beneath the sky that burning August gives,
While yet the thought of glorious Summer lives.

- William Morris


National Trail

job #4 - It all adds up.

One t'ther half in a romper boiler suit



plus one newly fixed water heater home from a spell in a Mikuni borstal



equals HOT WATER!

Yes, yes, we have hot water. Not so pikey now, heh?

Well, okay, we are...

But at least we're clean!

Every boat should have one (you’ll feel naked otherwise).

It's true. You don’t realise it yet but you will. Yes, you will and you'll wonder how you survived so long without one.

All great ships in history had one (well ok, not all). The Vikings knew how to build a good ship and they used them to ward off evil spirits and scare the Bejesus out of everyone. The fact that not everyone believed in Jesus at the time is a mere technicality. I could have said it was used to frighten the pants off everyone instead, but I’m sure not everyone had undergarments either.

A mere nine centuries later it was introduced on galleons and other such vessels to help a non-literate society distinguish one vessel from another. I guess saying “that big ship over there” no longer held sway.

Yes, I’m talking about fidgureheads.

Their appeal has waned over the years but has never been entirely lost.

They might not seem an obvious feature on a narrowboat... primarily because they’re not. But this shouldn’t put you off having one. Traditionally ‘eyes’ were painted on the bow of a boat to ward off evil spirits but let’s face it, when you’re drunk and it’s dark and you’re trying to remember which boat is yours as you stumble home, it can be a bit difficult to pick out your boat in a line-up of likely characters – and the spirits (good or bad) don’t lend a hand.

And this is where Jon (aka Sasquatch - there have been sightings...) steps in to help. He, of the @workboatpug on Twitter makes figurehads out of rope. It’s like a fender-corndolly-type affair. And they are blimmin’ brilliant.

He’ll make you one – just ask him, and then you, like us, can have delusions of grandeur too. We no longer think of the boat as a humble monkey-come-narrowboat. No, we now sail in a mighty vessel that we use to scare the life out of the local population. In my head we are aboard The Queen Anne’s Revenge and we’re up to no good. That would make the Hubby Blackbeard and me... erm, ok, we’ll leave this analogy behind...

So, here's to Jon, allowing drunkards* to find their boats again.




*Not that we're this way inclined...

Job #3 involved a lot of swearing and some falling over.

No, it wasn’t fixing the hot water. The heater has been sent away to a Mikuni borstal in Southampton where it will be prodded with a stick whipped into shape.

We’ve got to the point in boat living where in order to navigate our way through the good ship we have to dodge the obstacles littering our path. These obstacles consist primarily of junk. Useful junk though, such as extension cables, tins of paint, art boxes, various hammers and screwdrivers... and an exercise bike (no, really...). There isn’t anywhere handy to store the bike but a nice big sideboard with drawers and cupboards would be ideal for hiding everything else away whilst making the boat look sophisticated and grown up. Sideboards are for grown ups. This is a well known fact.

So, we ordered a nice looking one online and were a little surprised to discover we had to pay an extra £10 for delivery. We have a van, we could collect (read ‘we’ as ‘the hubby’) but no, it would take two people to deliver it in a very big lorry. Pah, I thought, I’ll show them when it arrives and I carry it nimbly onto the boat without any assistance. They’ll have to pay me back my £10 because I’m so strong and capable and would have effectively delivered it myself...

Ok, so it didn’t quite go according to plan.

The lorry arrived eventually after getting lost on the way to our pub.

Yes, pub.

I pointed at the tiny marina and pulled an expression that I hoped conveyed the message of “does this look like a pub to you?” I fear it didn’t work as the deliveryman asked again if it was. Eventually he lifted my flat pack sideboard into my awaiting cart with such ease that I thought maybe he had accidentally delivered a box of Styrofoam balls by mistake.

Now, I am a bit useless at maths, but he drove the lorry, he unloaded my sideboard, he loaded it onto my cart... I count that as ONE man. I was tempted to ask for half my money back since I only got half a delivery service... I didn’t though because he was nice and friendly and I’d only have to phone up the company later to inform them that someone was missing a box of Styrofoam balls and please could I have my sideboard. I'd mention it then.

It was only when I came to transfer the box onto the boat that I realised I had in fact mistaken the delivery man for a human and not the Iron-man that he was because I tried to lift the box up and... Nothing happened.

It was too bloody heavy for me to lift.

So heavy in fact, that I had to unpack it and move it piece by piece onto the boat whilst accepting that I am a wimp with no upper body strength...or lower body strength for that matter.
Still, I was yet to prove my capabilities by assembling the sideboard. I’d have it done in an hour or so. I mean, how hard can it be to assemble a piece of flat pack furniture in a confined space?


Look it has knobs, well, feet to most people, but nowt shows progress like a set of knobs...
Six hours later the hubby arrived home to find me swearing at bits of wood and screws and he may have taken pity on me because he got involved (with a complete disregard for the instructions...).

At this point I was left to control the unruly wildlife that was taking an interest in proceedings and consume copious amounts of tea.

But we did finish the epic build only eight hours behind my original schedule. It hasn’t stopped us dumping all our junk on the floor and we still trip over everything. Well, I do because I’m clumsy with no sense of balance or self awareness. The hubby just strides over it all... but we do feel all sophisticated and grown up now because we own a sideboard.

HMS LCTNOITRMWWTLI goes for a run. Well, it was more of an amble.

Yes, we took the old girl (or should that be boy since we gave the boat a masculine name?) out to stretch her (his?) legs and have a break from all the DIY.

We didn’t go too far, just far enough to get away from the hustle and bustle of our home mooring. There’s a secret spot that only the locals know and where the world can pass you by in relative silence. I say relative because the geese were noisy beggars and kept up with regular swim-by honkings.

The only folk we met on the river were the inmates of HMS Salter’s Party Boat of Loud Disco Noises or Goring, if you prefer its proper name.

We disguised ourselves as a grassy bank:

Actually, I don’t think the spot is that much of a secret because there was a well used fire pit. I started the camp fire whilst the hubby wasn’t looking (I deny all accusations that I have a habit of accidentally setting things on fire).

Rob also took the opportunity to stand in a field and play his mandolin. The lengths some musicians will go to to get their music heard. He did a great rendition of Postman Pat though. Yes, that was one of my requests...

I think I drank a gallon of tea whilst Rob pickled himself slowly in rum. That made winning at cards that evening a lot easier but it did mean I had to do some proper crewing on the way home the following morning whist Rob recovered.

Was lovely to get out onto the river again. Hopefully, we'll do it a lot more.